Why are divorce and remarriage okay?

[Rescued One]

I'm serious! I want a new discussion based strictly on the New Testament.

 

[Fred]

Matthew 5:32
But I say unto you, that whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
Matthew 19:9
And I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery.


New International Dictionary of New Testament Theology (NIDNTT)
The so-called "exceptive clauses" in Matt. 5:32 and 19:9 permit divorce and remarriage on the grounds of porneia, a term which includes adultery and any kind of illegitimate sexual intercourse.
(3:538, Separate, C. Brown)



1 Corinthians 7:15
But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God hath called us to peace.

I haven't done a detailed study of the following:

Grounds for Divorce: Why I Now Believe There Are More Than Two - CBMW

Editor's Note: The following essay appears in the Spring 2020 issue of Eikon. Until 2019, I held the common, historic Protestant view of divorce, namely, that adultery and desertion were the only two legitimate grounds for divorce allowed by Scripture.[1] This is the position set forth, for...

cbmw.org

 

[Rescued One]

I understand reasons for divorce. I don't undersand remarriage.

 

[Hazelelponi]

I understand reasons for divorce. I don't undersand remarriage.

Loneliness and the help and assistance of another person. We were created this way, for some not being married is easier, for others a real hardship or even a temptation.

 

[Fred]

I understand reasons for divorce. I don't undersand remarriage.

Should the innocent spouse suffer for the wrongs committed by the other?

 

[EarlyActs]

Loneliness and the help and assistance of another person. We were created this way, for some not being married is easier, for others a real hardship or even a temptation.

But I'm sure he means the morality of it.

 

[EarlyActs]

I understand reasons for divorce. I don't undersand remarriage.

The good thing about these lines is that you have already distinguished the discussion into at least two parts. But there are two more important ones.

1, there is Biblical divorce, resulting in one person remaining innocent and the other not.
2, there is Biblical remarriage, resulting in two innocent people from #1 being joined in marriage without breaking anything Jesus said.

What Jesus said prohibits a wide-usage of both. This came from the two leading schools of Jesus' time, Shammai and Hillel. Shammai allowances was what was meant by the 'any and every cause.' Hillel was much narrower, allowing only what Jesus did.

The modern idea that any two divorced people are free to remarry another others is therefore quite out the window to anyone trying to take a high view of Christ as King.

Then there is type of thing mentioned in Corinth, which is about the other spouse when one has become a believer. But notice that the believer is not the active one, not the initiator, only the allower. If the other really does not want to be a believer, the general rule of not being unequally yoked is in effect.

In the biography of Perpetua, a Christian woman in Rome right around the year 200, we learn that anyone interested in being a Christian had to take 3 months training to truly understand what they were up against. For one thing, they had to get a 'password' to access the class, to keep everything safe. Based on this we may suppose that early Christians as in Corinth may have needed that much time to truly know the faith to decide about it.

 

[Hazelelponi]

.

 

[Hazelelponi]

But I'm sure he means the morality of it.

Actually I believe the sister understands what the morality of it is supposed to be.

I was thinking that she is confused by cultural Christianity largely, and perhaps some of how the Church is to grapple with and approach some of these issues.

My last post asked a sincere question but I deleted it because it might have been too identifying, but in a world where adultery seems like the least common denominatior to one, and the greatest atrocities to another, on social issues it seems like we kind of need a better outline of how we should think about and consider these issues, both as they relate to to morality and as they touch on an unregenerate world reading Scripture.

There are underground railroads that help women change their identities and hide their children from very real monsters in matters of divorce. Then, you have the nominal active in activities and just having their sinful life now in matters of divorce. And then you have faithful Christians doing their best in Christ.

When at times we sit in the same bucket, it's good perhaps to address things like compassion, pastoral care, advice giving etc. And not only the distinct morality of the matter, but perhaps what type of heart we even approach the matter with.

Basically, morality+

 

[Rescued One]

Loneliness and the help and assistance of another person. We were created this way, for some not being married is easier, for others a real hardship or even a temptation.

I mean I don't understand it from a biblical perspective.

 

[Hazelelponi]

I mean I don't understand it from a biblical perspective.

Okay, I didn't understand your wording, I apologize for that.

So your wanting to know why the Bible allows remarriage?

Or whether it does?

Or whether in some circumstances it would - and how?

 

[Rescued One]

Lots of people think they are marrying Christians. Then the supposed Christian spouse is unfaithful and they divorce. The fairhful spouse meets another "Christian." Humans aren't omniscient. Is the second spouse a Christian?

 

[Rescued One]

Okay, I didn't understand your wording.

So you want to know why the Bible allows remarriage?

Or whether it does?

Both.

 

[Hazelelponi]

Both.

I would actually like to see an answer from someone like @John Bauer or @Carbon who might better understand the covenant distinctives and have the better explanation for you.

I pray your doing well! God bless you.

 

[Rescued One]

Thank you. BTW, I'm not looking for a husband. I'm just reflecting on things I see.

 

[Hazelelponi]

Thank you. BTW, I'm not looking for a husband. I'm just reflecting on things I see.

I am divorced and remarried, there are special circumstances, but it's rare, cultural Christianity just doesn't much take note of how they should behave before God, and often doesn't seem to care.

Adultery is the only reason we are allowed to divorce, I don't know all the distinctives surrounding the topic of remarriage though.

Because marriage is to reflect God's covenant with us, for most people divorce even for adultery is not a personal option, but of course there should be Church discipline, which would help alleviate some problems.

 

[Rescued One]

Should the innocent spouse suffer for the wrongs committed by the other?

I believe there are legitimate reasons for divorce.

 

[Rescued One]

Christians shy away from this topic of remarriage just like they won't discuss child abuse. But I wish there were answers.

 

[Hazelelponi]

Christians shy away from this topic of remarriage just like they won't discuss child abuse. But I wish there were answers.

There are answers, just not ones you might want to hear.

The Bible is written for God's elect, and no one else.

The people who are not elect and Spirit filled are abusing God's word, and committing sin by portraying it incorrectly.

A Spirit filled believer isn't committing child abuse. A Spirit filled believer isn't committing adultery. A Spirit filled believer isn't beating his wife.

My current husband is a Spirit filled believer, and wouldn't harm me for the world nor would he hurt me ever. He loves me, protects me and cares for me.

I've been married to a non-believer, he was more than just abusive, he was downright evil.

The two things are not the same, and will never be the same regardless of whether the non-believers hold a Bible or not.

God's people are not evil, only evil men are.

So when we talk about things like divorce and remarriage, we are talking about non-believers, or the past lives of new believers.

But what we are decidedly not talking about are God's people anymore.

Yes, there are legitimate reasons to remarry, but depending on what Scripture says and their specific situation on the matter a person might not want to.

Just so you know, my ex-husband became my ex-husband when I was a non believer myself and the man is dead now - or at least we are fairly certain of it as best we could learn.

Everyone is different. Everyone has their own situation. I am divorced and remarried but my situation is unique to myself and wasn't about believing Christians.

Oh, and it should be noted my former marriage was a contract agreement, not a Covenantal promise.

 

[makesends]

Oh goody, I get to do the soapbox thing again!

Why in the world do CHRISTIANS have to figure out right and wrong? To know how close they can come to wrong? To get "permission" to do what they already want to do?

God HATES divorce! Paul allowed it because of the hardness of their hearts. "But I call you to peace" is probably a more important statement than the 'exception clauses'.