I would recommend just using the term grace.. It will lead to alot less confusion
Maybe, then we could also drop the term, "free", from freewill, since
freewill is only used in the Bible concerning voluntary deeds, as opposed to required deeds. (For example, voluntary offerings as opposed to required offerings.)
But Irresistible Grace refers only to Regeneration.
I always look at it this way
just because something CAN happen. does not mean it will.
I personally do not think God has ever overruled someone's free will. I think Jonah is the best answer.
I think God strengthens a persons will (hardens their heart) to lead them to freely do what he wants. or like jonah, leads them on the way.
But something tells me we will not agree on this. so....
This is one of the issues at the core of our disagreements, though it is not itself THE core of it.
You use these commonly used human terms, human concepts:
1. What
can happen
2. God
overruling someone's will
3. A person's will 'is what it is', and God works with and around it.
The Calvinistic person (whether actually a Calvinist or Reformed—and I claim neither) works from:
3. God is what he is, default fact (sovereign), and he is thus the basis by which all other fact and principle exists.
2. God needn't overrule anyone's will. He is not about them, he does not exist for them. Instead, they are about him, no matter what they think and do. They exist and do what they do for HIS purposes, whether they mean to or not.
1. Nothing can happen except by God's purposes. The notion of "possibility" is only about the future, and it is only our human notion. God already has that in hand. Only one thing is possible in any single consideration.
Notice that our options from which to choose are only that—options from which to choose. In fact, only the one chosen ever happens. We have no evidence that anything else 'could have been' chosen. Even in the Bible references to the hypothetical —(for eg, "
If you had done (chosen, wanted, obeyed etc) 'this or that',
then I would have done (been, said, rewarded etc) 'something or other'...")— do not indicate that anything
could have happened, but to demonstrate various abstracts, such as what should have been chosen, or principles concerning what results follow which choices, and so on.
To be fair in representing the Reformed and Calvinist, not all of them put things the way I have there. That is my own way of saying it, but that is the basic difference.
The CORE of the difference between what are commonly called 'freewillers' and Calvinist/Reformed is in
Point-of-View: Humano-centrism vs God-centrism, (to some degree dealt with in points #3 above).