Some of what I am going to write may not sit well with some of you, but please understand that I'm not here to cause offense.
I’m going through the roughest time of my life. My wife and I are divorcing. I’m planning on moving out of my state when the whole legal process is over, and I’m basically going to be starting over.
I had been absent from my local church for a while because I couldn’t mentally or emotionally commit to attending on a regular basis while everything was going on. This Sunday, I decided to go alone without her, and it was an emotionally draining experience. The only thing I felt during the service was a sense of judgement because I failed to hold my marriage together and the vow I made before God is now broken. I felt devastated looking at the empty seat next to me. Unfortunately, I don't plan on going back. On top of that, I don't pray much anymore, and I am unable to focus when I try to read the Bible.
Recently, I started giving serious thought to whether or not I wanted to continue being a believer. The answer I came to is yes—I will continue to believe; however, it will most likely be what James calls a “dead faith" since I no longer have the strength to serve or have fellowship with others.
I don't know what all of this means for my eternal destiny, but I guess I'll find out one day.
I’m going through the roughest time of my life. My wife and I are divorcing. I’m planning on moving out of my state when the whole legal process is over, and I’m basically going to be starting over.
I had been absent from my local church for a while because I couldn’t mentally or emotionally commit to attending on a regular basis while everything was going on. This Sunday, I decided to go alone without her, and it was an emotionally draining experience. The only thing I felt during the service was a sense of judgement because I failed to hold my marriage together and the vow I made before God is now broken. I felt devastated looking at the empty seat next to me. Unfortunately, I don't plan on going back. On top of that, I don't pray much anymore, and I am unable to focus when I try to read the Bible.
Recently, I started giving serious thought to whether or not I wanted to continue being a believer. The answer I came to is yes—I will continue to believe; however, it will most likely be what James calls a “dead faith" since I no longer have the strength to serve or have fellowship with others.
I don't know what all of this means for my eternal destiny, but I guess I'll find out one day.